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It was the night before Christmas Eve, and we were about to have a loud visitor.  Squalls and windstorms preceded the snow, and I stood at our stove stirring the pasta noodles, veggies, and sauce together for our dinner.  Cross-legged, silently blinking at the television set, Faye waited patiently as she watched the movie we had put on.  I wondered at her choice, but for all the darkness in The Abyss it was her favorite, and if you stuck through to the end... then again, I didn't wonder at the choice.  Besides, the best line in movie history came from that movie: "Virgil, you wiener!"

It was well past that point now, as I listened to the dialogue.  It was getting up to the end, right now beginning Ed Harrison's deep dive.  I heard the line, "Little Geek just folded!" come from the television, and then all the sound stopped.  I knew what she was doing; her favorite part was coming up, and she wasn't going to let it play while I was still cooking.  She wanted me there.  I poked at the stir-fry with my tongs and shuffled the pan over the heat a few more times before switching it off.

Halfway into the living room with two plates, I smiled at her as she sat lit up by the glow of the paused movie.  The glow died, the refrigerator's hum ceased, and all of the Christmas lights went dark.  I let out a hiss and began to pick a slow path across the living room and found the coffee table with my toe, setting the dishes down before her.  "Stay.  I'll get a flashlight."

"Check the dogs," she breathed.  Her voice was weak, and I recognized it as the one she would get on the verge of tears.  I asked if she was okay, and she simply replied, "Stupid wind."

I nodded, feeling my way back into the kitchen and opening the cupboard beneath the sink.  I glanced out the kitchen window to the complex of dog houses in the back yard, counting one dog in each, lit by a moon that had not yet been blotted out by clouds.  They each lay staring balefully out at the wind with the same face I'm certain Faye was wearing.  They were okay other than being just as perturbed at the weather as their mother.  I switched on the flashlight and started back into the living room, opening the utensil drawer when I realized we needed forks.

It was then, when I closed the drawer that I stood for a moment looking at the one below it.  Remembering what was in it, I slid it open and looked at the contents, a smile passing over my lips.  "Well, heck, use them for what they're used for," I murmured to myself.

I walked into the living room, setting the forks down beside our plates and sat down next to her on the floor.  Without saying anything, I leaned forward and placed a very familiar candle on the table, and then turned to pick up the lighter I had lain next to me.  She shot her hand out and touched my shoulder.  "Conor, that's one of the wedding candles!" she whispered with an urgent breath.

"I know," I said, flicking the lighter.  A look of shock passed over her face as she watched me touch the flame to the wick.  "I really think we were just saving them for the right moment.  This is it."

"We have a flashlight," she said.  "Unless you forgot how to use that thing in your hands, you don't need to ruin--"

She stopped as I brought out the second candle and lit it from the first.  "Your movie was interrupted," I said, setting the second one down next to its partner.  "And I don't remember the speech.  I just remember what she was talking about."  I put my arm around her shoulders and turned her horrified face away from the dripping wax.  "I know they're beautiful.  They're us."

She battled with the horror for another couple of seconds before her eyes welled up with tears and she sobbed, "Oh God, I love you Conor."

"I love you," I said, smiling as I pressed her close to me.  "Wife."

She hadn't talked since she put her arm around me.  She just lay there, running her hand around my back between my shoulders, humming Christmas carols.  My eyes were closed, humming God Rest Ye Merry, Gentlemen along with her.  Kelly was off checking on other patients, while Doctor Lenard was whispering to another man who had just shown up at the doorway to the room.  He had smiled at me a moment, and then turned to Doctor Lenard, who was leaning close and using his clipboard to try to block any echo.

After a few minutes, I realized she was just constantly repeating the song over and over, when before she was switching between carols.  Her hand had slowed almost to a stop, and her fingers were just playing over the fabric of my shirt.  I sensed the pair at the door had grown still, and heard Kelly's soft footsteps approach.  Faye's hand clutched my shirt for a moment, a gentle squeeze, and I searched for her other hand.  Clasping it in mine, I moved my face closer to hers as her humming trailed off.  My insides knotted up, knowing what was happening, but I pushed that away.  I squeezed her hand and put my lips on her cheek.  Her humming stopped completely, and her hand relaxed in mine.  I heard Doctor Lenard shift, and then heard a pen slowly scratching on the clipboard.

"Jake," he said, "the heart is priority."

The other man walked inside, and I felt a hand on my back.  I lifted my head and nodded.  "I need to take her for a few moments," Jake said as I rose.  "I'm sorry, I have to be quick."

"Thank you," I said.  "This is her wish; give anything she can still give."

"Conor, if you need a moment," Doctor Lenard said.  "It'll take a few minutes to prepare the heart for transport.  But if you're going to do this, it needs to happen now.  You've got six hours max before ischemia sets in and the heart becomes invalid.  Can you get through in six hours?"

"This team does a good eighteen per in good conditions," I said after taking a deep breath.  "If we're blessed with good conditions all the way through, you're looking at three hours."

"Looks like the storm's on us in one and a half hours."

"Half our speed after that."  I started to slip on the undercoat I wore for mushing.  "I get there in four.  That's assuming no other unforeseen events."

Walking out, I noticed Jake whisper something to Kelly as he glanced my way.  I could take a guess, but that didn't matter right now.  "I'll foresee an event for you.  You'll probably go by way of Route 302.  What's waiting just after Mount Willard?"

"That would be one of New Hampshire's great testaments to the glory of gravity," I said.  "I'm aware of that, and so was the state when they put guardrails there."

"Lose your traction and have physics work in all the wrong ways against you," he replied, picking up another clipboard from the nurse's desk as we passed, "and guardrails won't be worth a thing."

"You have the authority to tell me no," I replied.  "How much trouble is this going to get you into?"

"You are certified to transport organs," he said.  "I verified that.  You check out on the mode of transportation that will carry the heart through.  That little brass buckle on your belt means you've handled some tough travel.  There's no one crazy as you out there in cars or trucks that could suddenly run you over.  Here's one thing that could cause trouble: if you get yourself in deep out there and the state has to save your rear-end, you're going to find yourself with a severe case of financial epistaxis."

"What?"

"You'll be paying through the nose," he replied, handing me the clipboard.  "The top form states that you understand the risks, yadda, yadda, yadda.  Conor, you can do this.  I'm not saying they're just windmills.  They're giants.  I want to know that you're aware of how hard those things can hit."

"All I know," I said, "is that Fate owes me a break."

He nodded.  "But it's her choice when she gives it to you."

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